Growing up, I was subjected to a “step-father” I hated for many, legitimate reasons.  For 10 years, this man was an uninvited part of my life.  There is no greater feeling of helplessness to a child than the inability to escape an adult that makes them feel unimportant and belittled.  There is so much more to this but I’m going to focus on just one small part that I can now laugh at.

I was not an easy teenager.  Hell, I’m not an easy adult so all my friends who just read that can stop snorting.  Anyway…  I was mouthy and defiant.  I definitely did not like being told what to do.  This man made it his mission to tell me what to do.  He was overt and he was sneaky.  Either way I got in trouble and because I hated him, I fought him every step of the way.  He would smile at me when I was getting yelled at.  He would pinch me if I didn’t move fast enough.  No one ever saw this.  

This story is going down a dark road.  I didn’t mean for that to happen.

I used to leave my shoes everywhere, in the living room mainly.  So, he decided that I would learn to pick up my shoes if he threw them out in the front yard every time he found them on the floor.  It was the early days of this new consequence so I didn’t realize they were outside when I lost my mind looking for them one morning.  I was late for school.  

“They’re outside.”

“Asshole.”

I got in trouble.

Game on, motherfucker!  I’d leave my shoes, he’d throw them out,   Eh.  I’d just go find them amongst the weeds and be on my way.

I have two kids.  They leave their shit everywhere.  

Never before have I felt such an understanding of the man I hated my whole life…